First, she got married on the same day Nicole Kidman married Keith Urban.

And now, Marcia Cross has announced her pregnancy on the same day Suri Cruise is presented to the world.

Seriously, her publicist should be shot.

Well, here she is.

Suri Cruise.

Allegedly.

That hair so looks like a baby toupee to me. And those eyes - Photoshopped. Seriously, it creeps me out.

Why all the secrecy? There’s still a story here, I’m telling you. It ain’t over, Tom! Someone, somewhere will get to the bottom of this alleged offspring!!!